Originally written in 2021-23? Not sure...
Dear Love,
6 feet tall and bulletproof.
My heart.
Love.
Personified.
But I also wish I was bulletproof.
From the lies.
The past that hurts.
Words that still haunt me everyday.
I wrap them around me and lean in to their beautiful truth.
All of them.
And each one is true except for the lies.
Those are the ones that I want to ricochet.
But all the truth?
Each person sent them through my veins becoming part of my DNA.
Me, believing and holding to every single word.
Believing forever was finally here.
Until it wasn't.
And if love is faster than a bullet,
Love, why are you eluding me?
Is this what it means to be alive?
Without you, Love?
I don’t want to be alive without you, Love.
Why aren’t you killing all this loneliness,
the kind where I’m not with with whomever I’m supposed to spend forever with?
Or is forever a lie?
Is “Alis volat propriss” my life song?
What I was born to do?
Hell no.
That’s wrong.
I wasn’t made for this.
My heart feels too much.
I love too great.
I love with all of me.
Don’t believe me?
Ask any ex.
Six feet tall and bulletproof proof.
Heart.
Soul.
Love, every time you shoot, you fucking miss.
You hit and shoot to kill but don’t kill all that’s within me that’s NOT love, and isn’t dead.
And I’m dying waiting on the death of loneliness so I can finally be fully alive in love.
Love, where are you?
Pull the trigger.
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https://open.spotify.com/track/6muBXuT9XaTYwiXFzLIC1L?si=c59b488d8e3d4520
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